Friday, August 29, 2008

Parents and Children Learn By Experience

Everyday I see people minding their own life while there are others who are too busy minding about somebody else's life.Everyone around us seemed to be preoccupied by these things--money,fame,glamour,if not friendship,love,or sex,or just nonesense...

I see or hear couples arguing about stupid things.These nonsense arguments usually lead to a more serious fight.Every battle begins with a misunderstanding, and if not solved early will lead to a piled-up misjudgements and harsh comments on each side.A family with parents who keep on arguing usually produced traumatized children.A family becomes fragile if both parents are unstable in their emotions and decisions. Wife starts a fight with her husband because he does not earn enough for the family.If not it is the husband complaining about the overspending of his wife who keeps on shopping and buying unnecessary stuffs..

Living in a world of madness creates stress to the people around and as the younger generations witness the examples of the older generations they have the tendency to copy the same-- in time they might grow up to be exactly like one of their parents.

As a parent, we have to be careful on what we say knowing that children will learn from our example. And when we say NO we have to at least explain why or else they will not obey you.When my son was playing nearby while I was ironing and then later tried to approach me with a curious look on what I was doing,I said No instantly but he didn't understand why and kept on approaching so I scream STOP! He didn't know why I prevented him from approaching and didn't understand why I yelled at him.Little kids don't feel the sense of danger that parents feel... we learn that by experience or by other's I took his hand and let him feel the warm ironing board. He only understood the danger of "very hot stuffs" when I let him remembered how he reacted the last time he was eating a very hot rice. Another instance was when I was cutting meat in the kitchen, I told him not to play with knives and other sharp object because he might get cut like the meat.One time my husband got an accidental cut so I took the opportunity to show him how it is to get an accident. He was like curious on interviewing his father to know how it feels and later on told him to be careful next time.

My point is, we don't just say NO to somebody without saying an explanation. Arguments starts when somebody is taking his authority over someone but that someone is doing a rebellion. In order to establish trust between each other, the other one has to make an honest if not invented explanation.I know a little child asking so much questions is sometimes a pain in the ass-- especially if you don't know the answer or how to answer according to the child's level of understanding.Even if sometimes, you just guess or invent an explanation,at least, there is a little explanation he got.

Communication is very important to establish an agreement and understanding. But to communicate with someone we have to be tactful on selecting less harsh words if we want to do sermon or scolding. Try to be gentle with words yet firm in your eye-contact. Eye contact is important if you want your point to be understood. Then whatever it is that you argue about, try to pause and take time to listen to the other party, you might realize it's just a misunderstanding.It happend already many times especially if both are talking and none of them listened but the people surrounding them.

Tuesday, August 26, 2008

Career as a Mom-- What Did I Miss?

So many things I missed these past few days...or let's say these past few weeks of my absence in the blogworld.

First, I miss replying my emails and offline messages in YM so as checking the comments section in my friendster...Gosh I miss my old friends .... my chatfriends, my school friends, my close friends,my friendster friends...especially those who left me comments and greets me in the comment section...well, what can I do if they prefer to greet me or say what they want to say to me in the comment section instead of just saying a plain comment or sending a message through email?Anyway,I'm glad they haven't forgotten me and stay thoughtful eventhough I miss to rebound back(repeated again for the second twice ehehehe) the thought sometimes.Pasensya na po!

Second,I miss my gardening as a hobby especially now that summer is still here(even though the weather in Belgium is not as promising as the Philippines' tropically hot summer.(oh,how I miss my country's climate!) Now,my garden is not as beautiful and as colorful as the last year.Well,a new baby changes all my previous routines and priorities. These days,my mind is mostly about the baby's well-being as a first priority.And I'm always pre-occupied by things that meet the baby's needs....and then my needs just right after...and I enjoy it actually.It feels good to be a mom the second time around....

Then, I miss a little bit the will be a little bit complicated now that we have another one added to the list of travellers but we don't have to worry about that right now...we are not yet in the mood to travel again anyway.Wherever it will be... it can wait.
Lastly, I guess I miss my old me...the single me... the one who was carefree soaring like a bird...hehehe...anyway the old me has evolved and has changed her avatar...she can never be the same again...especially now that there's another part of her being transformed and moulded into another life...everything has changed and these changes brings new challenges...And the new me is always ready for the new challenges life has to offer...Bring it on!

Sunday, August 17, 2008

Busy Mom Again

It's been many weeks I have not updated my blog.In case you have not read the latest happenings in my life, I just had my 2nd child and now back as a busy mom again.... changing diapers, less-sleep if not sleepless nights, singing lullaby, and what else?hhmm... another mess to clean up and more laundry to wash...No, I'm not complaining...having a new baby around and taking care of this lovely little creature is indeed a sacrifice to make...and as a saying goes "in every sacrifice, there is a prize".

Having him is also a gift--another blessing in the family.Each day is an experience I wouldn't trade for anything else in this world... not even for a ticket to go somewhere beautiful and fun... even a house and lot or Euromillion will not convince me to choose over having him in my life....that's why I'm not even spending a little time to update my blog! haha!... in short he's one of the few that matters to me right now.So here we are, exposed to the internet for everyone in my relatives and friends to view...