Career as a Mom-- What Did I Miss?

So many things I missed these past few days...or let's say these past few weeks of my absence in the blogworld.

First, I miss replying my emails and offline messages in YM so as checking the comments section in my friendster...Gosh I miss my old friends .... my chatfriends, my school friends, my close friends,my friendster friends...especially those who left me comments and greets me in the comment section...well, what can I do if they prefer to greet me or say what they want to say to me in the comment section instead of just saying a plain comment or sending a message through email?Anyway,I'm glad they haven't forgotten me and stay thoughtful eventhough I miss to rebound back(repeated again for the second twice ehehehe) the thought sometimes.Pasensya na po!

Second,I miss my gardening as a hobby especially now that summer is still here(even though the weather in Belgium is not as promising as the Philippines' tropically hot summer.(oh,how I miss my country's climate!) Now,my garden is not as beautiful and as colorful as the last year.Well,a new baby changes all my previous routines and priorities. These days,my mind is mostly about the baby's well-being as a first priority.And I'm always pre-occupied by things that meet the baby's needs....and then my needs just right after...and I enjoy it actually.It feels good to be a mom the second time around....

Then, I miss a little bit the travels...it will be a little bit complicated now that we have another one added to the list of travellers but we don't have to worry about that right now...we are not yet in the mood to travel again anyway.Wherever it will be... it can wait.

Lastly, I guess I miss my old me...the single me... the one who was carefree soaring like a bird...hehehe...anyway the old me has evolved and has changed her avatar...she can never be the same again...especially now that there's another part of her being transformed and moulded into another life...everything has changed and these changes brings new challenges...And the new me is always ready for the new challenges life has to offer...Bring it on!

Busy Mom Again

It's been many weeks I have not updated my blog.In case you have not read the latest happenings in my life, I just had my 2nd child and now back as a busy mom again.... changing diapers, less-sleep if not sleepless nights, singing lullaby, and what else?hhmm... another mess to clean up and more laundry to wash...No, I'm not complaining...having a new baby around and taking care of this lovely little creature is indeed a sacrifice to make...and as a saying goes "in every sacrifice, there is a prize".

Having him is also a gift--another blessing in the family.Each day is an experience I wouldn't trade for anything else in this world... not even for a ticket to go somewhere beautiful and fun... even a house and lot or Euromillion will not convince me to choose over having him in my life....that's why I'm not even spending a little time to update my blog! haha!... in short he's one of the few that matters to me right now.So here we are, exposed to the internet for everyone in my relatives and friends to view...

Unwanted Pregnancy and Denial of Pregnancy

One of the shocking news I have read from the Philippines are the 2 cases of babies thrown by their own mothers...one was thrown from a running cab(who luckily survived)and one thrown from the window of a building(9th floor,dead).I was so sad to learn that certain desperate women can do such acts to their own child.But then,why do we have to judge them as bad women for their behavior?It's their own life and they are the ones who are taking control of themselves(which I doubt if they are still in control).Surely, they've been trapped inside certain circumstances wherein they feel the only way out is to get rid of their responsibility to take care of a baby alone...certain reasons of their acts could be:
1.she's a teen age girl with a boyfriend unwilling or unable to support the baby once born

2.she's wants to finish studying and taking care of a baby means she is obliged to stop and concentrate on her responsibilities being a mother...

3. she is considered a role model in the family and in school but one day got hot with her boyfriend and went beyond the limits...few months after she learned she got pregnant.

4.her parents are unaware of her pregnancy and they might not accept her "immorality" once they learned she's pregnant and keeping the baby would mean a big burden and a curse.

5.she undergoes a mental state wherein there is a denial of pregnancy and her mind is unaware that her body is pregnant and does not show any signs of it like weight gain and bulging tummy.Discovering just during her time of labor, she will suddenly have mental shock and panic and might just decide to get rid of "that thing".

6.she is surrounded by people with strict religious practices.Knowing she will no longer be accepted among their religion scared her to be cast away so she thinks of ways on how to get rid of the baby without abortion.

Among the Catholic society and some other religions,abortion has been seen as an evil act...immoral,dangerous, and deadly.But what's more dangerous,immoral and deadly than a mother throwing a new-born baby from inside a running taxi or from a 9th floor of a building?That woman concerned,feeling alone and helpless, had to choose between 2 evils.

There is also that case wherein a woman's troubled mind could lead her to a denial of pregnancy...a situation of "mind-over-matter" in which your mind is unconscious of the pregnancy occurring on one's body.Mind-over-matter is a strong power from conscious or unconscious intentions of the person.In this case of denial of pregnancy, since the mind's influence is focused on other priorities of that woman like her stressful work or busy studies, her mind is no longer conscious on other influences of the physical world including her physical body.She still does the usual stuffs everyday like taking a shower,dressing up,eating but mostly they are done as a mental program of reflex called as daily habits.As an effect of this unconscious pregnancy,the body will also not show the physical changes and signs of the ongoing pregnancy.

This power of mind-over-matter is also applied by certain people of paranormal discipline in which they can walk on fire or on water without being burned nor drowned...the mind has a powerful capability to control the surrounding physical world.In the case of denial of pregnancy, the mind neglecting or let's say:not recognizing the body's process of procreation causes the body to continue the "babymaking process" as part of nature's work but making the obvious signs unknown to the mind.This special case has never been acknowledged yet by many people especially in the Philippines, but there are already many case reports of this kind in europe.A known case in France involves a singer,Sherifa Luna, who won the French version of American Idol.She just learned she's 8th month pregnant after she experienced excessive fatigue and went for a check up.The ultrasound showed she's carrying an 8th-month fetus but her body didn't show-up any signs of an 8th-month pregnant woman.Everybody could not believe it since nobody noticed any signs...she dressed up like any teenage girls and danced like crazy with her belly button shown but really no sign of a bulging tummy!The funny thing she said during an interview was: after she learned she's pregnant,she first got shocked but became excited knowing she will be a future mom very soon...and then all the signs of pregnancy just showed up like nausea,vomiting,fatigue,cravings...her tummy starts to grow fast too....the weird thing she said was she got her menstrual periods during the previous months but not anymore after she learned she's pregnant!

Cases like this are hard to believe and most women either ended up accepting their babies or killing them.I've read some articles regarding some reports of this issue.

Description and Petition from the French Association for the Recognition of Denial of Pregnancy:

This is based on a population study in Germany:

A report from a study on American women citing a rate increase of unwanted pregnancies on poor women:

As a personal opinion,I would suggest that instead of teaching the youth on how to put a condom or take a pill, they should teach them how to take control of their sexual life...to act with precautions and to be aware of responsibilities following these acts.

I've Decided to do Breastfeeding

Yes,boys and girls,I've decided to breastfeed my baby once he's there.I always believe that breastfeeding is still the best food for the babies...especially the newborn ones.Colostrum gives the baby the best protection against diseases by supplying the needed immunities acquired by the mother against certain diseases and this stronger resistance is passed on to the babies.

During my first experience of breastfeeding, it was a little bit painful because of its sensibility but later on I got used to it and my first baby did grew well without any allergies whatsoever.It's also good for his immune system to fight against certain diseases and it helps the mom's body(especially the uterus to go back to its normal place and shrink back to its normal size). Also,in many cases,mothers who are breastfeeding minimized the risk of rapid gain of weight since their babies are also consuming the extra calories and stored fats and nutrients in their body.Nature is designed to make the necessary storage of extra fats and nutrients to supply the babies need during pregnancy until after birth of the fetus.That's why here in europe and other developed countries,certain mothers who decide not to breastfeed are prescribed some medications to help them control their body's natura response to motherhood and control their weight gain by slowly stopping the production of milk which is the automatic process of nature after a mother gives birth and by slowly cutting off their urge to eat on big quantities due to wider space occupied by the stomach after the baby is out.

I've noticed that in the Philippines, the idea of breastfeeding is considered by many people as inconvenient and for others it's disgusting to see a mother breastfeeding her baby...some educated people find breastfeeding as a low-class practice.The commerce of formula milk has slowly changed the mentality of many parents especially the moms. The influence of medias on people made a great impact of educating parents the wrong information that formula milk makes your baby more intelligent and even gives them skills.Take for example Promil...according to their famous advertisement Promil is the milk for gifted children( it gives the parents the idea that if they give their babies Promil they will grow up to be like the kid who knows how to play the violin).Another mentality I've noticed on some people is, being able to buy a formula milk means you can afford and it makes them feel they are in the higher class of the society...while breastfeeding moms makes them look like their family is tight in budget and so they cannot afford to buy the baby the "high standard" form of the baby's nourishment.

Me, personally, I still think that these products provide false informations and exaggerated claims to sell their products.Business is business and money is the strongest motivation of most people making the advertisements.No offense...just an opinion from a concerned mom.

Preparations for the Coming Baby

Since a few weeks ago,my husband and I have already been preparing for the coming of our second child. I'm already in my 8th-month pregnancy and the baby might decide to come out earlier than the expected date.Even our son is already excited to meet his baby brother.

The baby's room is almost ready.It just needs a little arrangement.The baby's bed just needs its bedsheets and the blanket.We don't put it yet to avoid the dust.Anyway,my husband still has time to do it since I will be staying 5 days in the hospital for a normal delivery and in case of cesarean, 10 days stay is needed to monitor the mom and the baby's health condition.

My suitcase is almost ready ... just need to put the toiletries/bathroom stuffs.We have already reserved a private room in Erasme Hospital which is a bit more expensive but it will be covered by my husband's company health insurance(family members are included).

Dealing With The Past

Thinking back to my "single years",my self reflection helps me a lot in the process of understanding my every reaction to every situation.The way I handle things right now are mostly influenced by the effects of past experiences that brought strong emotional impact on me.Dealing with my present life has something to do with my past life because the way I handle my self at this moment is still influenced by some things that happened in the past.

Here are some influencial things that possibly build up my present character:
1.past hopes and dreams(personal outlook)
2.my ability to cope on every situation and control over life
3.my sense of trust and security towards others
4.the way I handle myself on a relationship
5.my emotional responses/handling my feelings

Being single and still naive,my hopes and dreams changed as I mature from a teenage girl into a woman.At first my hopes were to finish college,and find a nice job to help my family from poverty(yes I grew up in a poor family of 9 children).My parensts didn't want me to pursue college because they had enough with the eldest daughter who finished her studies but after,she got other plans on her own instead of helping back our parents.Yes,they expected her to pay back all the sacrifices they have made.And now that they got disappointed,the rest of us had to suffer the consequence.

My parents had no interest of supporting my studies.They just told me it was useless for a girl to be financed to finish college and then end up married and the husband will have to harvest what they have sown.It was a very striking phrase that really hurt me bad.And so,I rebelled and enrolled myself in college with the help of my sister,(she pursued her studies as a government scholar and worked part-time to support her food and other expenses) I also tried to stand on my own...Luckily my sister's employer also allowed me to work part-time.I also auditioned at the university chorale and passed as a soprano...so I got a discount on my tuition fee.I had to budget my salary for the weekly allowance+tuition+house rental since my parents are not really there to support me.

It was really a miracle how I managed to overcome all those challenges...behind my story I encountered kind and generous people(like my sister and mo co-workers) who helped me and supported me one way or another when I'm short with food budget(my mother sometimes asked my boss for a cash advance to pay for her photo expenses or bus fare(she's a photographer and has to go to the city to have her films developed).So,instead of her giving me something to help me survive in the city,it's me obliged to give her whatever I can give her.And so, to cut this painful story short,I still survived those 4 years of traumatic and painful situations.

Before,my dream was to find my ideal man who is tall,handsome,and rich,loving,understanding,thoughtful,faithful etc.But all of my boyrfiends were too far from being that man.Then I realized a man like that does not exist.And so, I had to deal with what package they had to offer...first bf(he was too good for me) only lasts for a day or 2 coz I just suddenly changed my mind.I got scared that I panic the next day to learn that I have a boyfriend.I think he got the qualities that qualify for that man I'd be willing to marry(he's not rich but it's not the reason I backed out)I was thinking I was still too young(18yrs old) to get a very serious boyfriend like him and so I decided not to talk to him anymore...just like that...no formal break-up(I know I was crazy and cruel...sorry M....)I got scared I'd follow the same path like my sisters and be cursed again by my parents...(the scholar got pregnant and had to get married to her boyfriend to give her child a legitimate father...the strict Catholic mentality that women are obliged to do to be formally accepted in the society)She lost her scholarship but still she was able to finish her course.The eldest sister who finished college and got a job got pregnant as well and again had to marry the father of her baby.

Second boyfriend,I got cheated(he shagged another girl and the girl got pregnant not knowing who's the real father).Yeah...bad karma.He tried to get back with me by threatening to kidnap me or messing up the other girl's life(the girl he shagged was a friend and she got a boyfriend but told me before that she's got a crush on my boyfriend)...to cut this really crazy story,I got back with him for a few days and then managed to ask him to let me go...

Third boyfriend,only lasts for a month.I don't know how to explain our relationship.It was like he treated me like a goddess and him my slave.hahaha!I found him sooo nice and sooo shy and sooo obedient and sooo quiet.It's too much outbalanced that I could spoil myself and make him suffer.Having me in his life kind of made him feel inferior.I don't want to keep him just because of that.It made me feel guilty that he lost his self worth and self respect for the sake of me.And so I tried to let him understand the reasons why our relationship will not work for long...he cried...but I guess he understood.

Then,Fourth boyfriend,another cheater(as I was told he got 1 or 2 more gf).I wanted to hear it directly from him but this time it was me who got no explanation.Weeks passed still no call,no visit,no news from him and so I just formally ended it up by email(the only way I can reach him successfully).Well,they all made me feel special...and although each found its own end,I had no regrets...there were no "below the belts" involved so the V-flag is still up...(Uh Uhhh...is that why they cheated?)

Before I finished college,my father suffered for months with cancer and then later on died and our family had to grief for the loss.I had to expect the unexpected and hope to be able to cope up with the loss.But anyway,it's not like I rely on him financially.I suffered a loss of a father and realized I can't control over some things like death.Instead,I have to accept the fate as another challenge.It made me change my perspective.My sense of trust and security on him has long been lost and so it was not so difficult for me to move on.What concerned me was how my other younger brothers and sisters would handle the loss.

My past life was very chaotic than my life right now.Ahhh...at last,tranquility!.Indeed life sometimes takes you up and then takes you down.There was a friend from my part-time work,Gina, who once saw me crying out my problems.She told me,"Dont worry too much,time will come,all those tears that drop from your eyes and all the pain you're feeling right now will be rewarded with tears of joy and happiness."And indeed, with patience and perseverance,I had overcome those trials in my life.Thanks to the curse of my parents that turned out to be a blessing.

By writing this story about my past life,it serves to me as a therapy to help me see where I came from and what I have done to reach where I am right now.Looking back how I got tossed and torn by fate and still manage to survive until now,it gives me more courage and inspiration to go on and live my this life I chose to follow...hoping and still dreaming of another bright future ahead.

Five Reasons Why We Should Not Watch TV Too Much

Television viewing has already become a part of most people's daily habits.Some can't even sleep if they can't watch their favorite TV shows before going to bed.

While TV shows are informative and interesting,some of its programs are also destructive not only to the young viewers but also to the adults.Here's why:

1.Commercials: Though these just take few seconds of viewing,they usually create a great impact on the way you see things.These short programs are designed to sell you stuffs by touching your guilt point if not your curiosity..a psychological way that works effectively by bombarding your brain with these repetitive information until its coded into your subconscious mind.The reason why so many attractive people still find themselves unhappy and not contented with their looks and some girls buy stuffs to make them look better and feel better if not starving themselves just to look skinny.They usually put the viewers into a mindset of guilt with poor sense of self-worth.

2.It creates bad habits : Having too much attachment to your favorite programs can lead you to poor eating habits.Instead of spending some time preparing and cooking healthy dishes in the kitchen,we would tend to be always in a hurry in order to catch certain TV programs...so we prefer to buy more expensive prepared meal ready to be reheated(or takeout meals like pizza or burgers).Poor eating habits lead to poor health because it limits your time to eat healthy and do exercise.Some people even eat in front of their TV.Watching late night shows can also lead to sleep disorder and insomnia.

3.Less communication in the family: Because each viewer's attention is focused on the TV shows,it's more likely difficult to have real conversations with the people in the house.Less communication between couple and their kids mean weaker establishment of their relationship...which could eventually lead to stress.A TV in the bedroom is a big blockage for a couple's romance and sex.Couples tend to fall asleep waiting for their partner to finish watching TV.Divided attention between TV and spouse could create stress that would turn into disputes and unsolved issues.

4.Missed time for other opportunities: Spending too much time a day watching TV is a hindrance for a person to do more quality time for a productive life.Instead of wathing TV for hours we could have done other things like playing with the kids,doing chores like cleaning the house,calling some friends,gardening,or learning a new skill or simply doing your hobby of painting or cooking new dishes.

5.It adds up to your bills: Having 1 or more TV in the house consumes electricity and if you get a connection from a company then it means you also have to pay another monthly bills for the cable/satellite services.These expenses if put into a savings account could make you spend a nice vacation after a few years.

Minding what you can get out of watching TV can make you realize how much wasted time you have spent and how many opportunities you have missed.By cutting your TV hours spent,you can not only build stronger family ties but also save some money and learn new skills as well as explore your other interests for a richer and happier life.

Costume of School Carnival

My son was very excited to show me his costume of the school carnival. He was dressed as a drum.His grandma (who picked him up)told me he didn't want to take it off because he wanted to show it to me once at home.So even if it's a little bit uncomfortable on his head he didn't mind at all.

It was fun coz as he was telling me what they did in school he was also trying to reinact what he did with the other kids and while trying to remember the other details he was doing this funny pose while thinking and saying hmmm...ahhmm...(thinking) Then as he saw I took some photos,he asked me to give him my phone and show him the photos I've taken....funny!

Dealing With Mom-in-Law

This is the first time and probably the last time that I will say something about my life with my mom-in-law.Compared to other wives' complains about their mom-in-law,I think I got more luck.Mine, she's more of a big help to me than a pain in the ass.

Mostly once every week she invites us for a dinner in their house and 2-3 times every weekdays she volunteers to pick up my son in school.It's her car I use to practice and learn how to drive( it was her suggestion ). She cooks well. She offers to do clothes repair(she has an electric sewing machine)like replacing a broken zipper or adjusting oversized pants to make the leg length fit my size which is shorter than the european standard S.Aside from that,she also gives some helpful advices on how to remove stains on different fabrics and which products are effective for cleaning specific dirts on specific material( teakwood,tiles,carpet etc.)

If compared to my own mother, I would say my husband is lucky to have a mother like her.Well, just a little summary about my mother:she does not really know how to cook and she was always busy earning money that she had no more time guiding us.Being born as a middle child in a big family I always got into trouble.Dealing with older or younger siblings got me stuck in between.In every trouble,I was always the one to blame.When having a dispute with my older brother or sister,I got no right to defend or else I'd be disrespectful...with younger siblings,I got blamed if they cry or got hurt while playing because I was in charge to keep an eye of their safety.Anyway,those were the reasons why I'd say I got more luck having a mom-in-law who is very helpful and supportive

But she also got some "defects" that I would say are not THAT much to be bothering me. Like my mom,she also has a voice that carry from Belgium to the Philippines.She can't control it once she starts talking.And she really said what's on her mind or how she feels.Like last week on a Friday,she called me up to tell me that she was there in school to pick up Matt but the school was closed because of the "Journée pédagogique" and she blamed me for not telling her that there's no class.I told her (in french) that I thought she knew about it since she was the one who picked up Matyu in school that Thursday and normally the teacher informed those who pick up the kids either orally and was also written on the board...She said she did not pay attention of what's written on the board and she did not care to talk to the teacher...I just replied " what more can I say?" Then she answered back in a sarcastic way: "Well,I'm just wasting my time here in school for nothing.Then she hanged up on me. After that I felt guilty but what can I do? I was assuming she knew about it but she was really very mad that my explanation was not enough to calm her down.Anyway,we met that Sunday and did talk like nothing happened.

Lesson I've learned: Sometimes you have to be the one to make an effort to understand more than to be understood.It usually saves you from a never-ending argument that might eventually end up in bad terms.

Here's a useful link for those who really have a hard time dealing with their mom-in-law. Good luck!

Playhouse Disney Addict

Well, I guess my son is not the only one who is fund of watching Playhouse Disney channel. Each day for him is not complete without a glimpse of his favorite shows like Baby Einsteins,Roley Poly Olly, Mickey Mouse and Manny and his tools. After school his usual first request is to turn on the Satellite TV right before asking a snack.

I cant blame him if he's into their shows.I mean,even myself, I sometimes do some humming on some of their songs unconsciously( like the Think,think,think of the Super Detectives and the melody of Mickey Mouse right when his house shows up from the ground) like it got programmed into my subconscious as I keep on hearing it repeatedly.

The good thing is he's learning some good stuffs out of Baby Einsteins like the music of Beethoven etc... I can't say it's a perfect show for my kid but more or less it helps him how to analyze on given problems and puzzles.For me, their interactive shows make my kid more curious on solving mysteries and how stuffs work.And now that he got more learning, he's starting to ask questions like How and Why is it like this and like that?But you know kids, sometimes, they ask some How's and Why's that even parents can't figure out the answer or can't explain well according to the kid's level of understanding....or some subject answers to those questions are just too sensitive for his young age to tackle.

Being parents can be challenging especially on certain years of the child's growth. But like the famous phrase of the Spiderman,"With great gift comes great responsibilities." Each child is a gift of life and with this gift we are bound to take our responsibilities... not only taking care of these gifts but also guarding them from harm.To all parents, more power to your upbringing and guidance!

A Visit to the Gynecologist

We went to the gynecologist this afternoon to get another checkup and an echography.The doctor was a bit tight with her patients' schedule due to extra minutes spent answering phone calls of her other patients.At last, it was my turn after more than 30 minutes of waiting...

The baby is fine according to the echography images...I was so glad to see the images on the screen once again. My husband and I were eager to know if it's a girl or a boy so we ask the doc to check as well (can't wait anymore to be thrilled during delivery) but seems like the baby was too shy or too much conscious of the disturbance that its position was really difficult for us and the doctor to confirm. But anyway,we'll know next time.

Back home after that check up,my husband called for an appointment for Echography anatomic...it's a more precise echography in which they will really measure the exact growth of the fetus...if it's normal according to its weeks of age.Well,it is scheduled by the beginning of April just after we'll come back from our travel to the UAE. I hope everything will be ok by that time...

A New Story of a Desperate Housewife

Oh well,as desperate as it would sound,you sure will understand what I mean.I didn't get enough sleep last night(again).Yes,it's just one of those "stuffs" pregnant women usually undergo....insomnia...or better yet, sleeping disorder.I don't know why but I just suddenly wake up without any reason then I couldn't go back to sleep at once.Maybe it's due to my husband's snoring,or the sound of all the appliances in the house on stand-by or it's just me and my sleeping pattern.My sleep rythm is starting to get fragile that even a little bed movement can wake me up.This is not my first time getting pregnant yet this pregnancy is indeed more challenging than my first one.

I guess I just slept like 4 hours all in all.Worse thing is when I stay awake for more than 30 minutes my stomach starts to crave for something to eat or if not,it's my dry mouth that would urge me to get up and drink water...then after...to the water disposal "wee wee"....lol
Today I'm desperate to find answers on the internet or tips how to get a better sleep.

6:30 in the morning my husband's alarm radio turned on and there is no way I can go back to sleep to wait for the alarm assigned for me at 7:25. So before my alarm radio turns on I am already wide awake in the toilet or already dressing up ready to go down and eat a little breakfast.Today (like many other days)I was lucky my sweetie brought me a cup of hot chocolate milk and a bread.It was a relieve(for my complaining stomach) as well as it was a bother for the rest of my body that was still complaining of fatigue and requesting for more sleep.But well,I got to get prepared than just stay there lying down still wide awake.As all weekdays,I have to do my routine of getting myself ready and waking up my son and getting him ready as well then send him to school.
So there it was,we were able to catch the bus right on time...still feeling exhausted,I kept on yawning on the way to school.
As usual,before I left him inside the classroom,I was taking a look at what he's doing and how he is mingling with the other kids.I can see he is well-behaved there(maybe because there are lots of other kids well-behaving to get a reward later on and there is that famous reserved white chair for those who will be punished to sit on it at the corner).

I got back home and still tired from the lack of sleep.I decided to lie down on the sofa and tried to get back to sleep again.To my surprise,my polish friend gave me a surprise visit.She is also a desperate housewife ike me...lol. Her son and my son are in the same school and today she took him there by bike.She decided to drop by to talk about her miserable days with her mom-in-law who will stay in their house until end of March.I understand she needed somebody to talk to and share her burdens and headaches and so I set aside my sleeping plan to listen to her and show my sympathy.It also helped me to think that my life is better and my problem is nothing compared to hers.Somehow she helped me with my problem...knowing that someone else has worse problems than mine makes me feel less problematic.

Bizarre Dreams

Last night I had again one of those weird dreams. This time, I did not remember exactly how it started...but it was like this...

I was like in a place near a church and I had to cross two streets to be able to go there.In the first street,there were only very few cars passing so I didn't have a hard time to cross.After I crossed that street I had to climb a little bit to reach a passage which is on the top of bonsai trees that looked like a kind of ficus grown and trimmed to only reach 2 or 3 meters tall.Their 2 big branches that spread apart create that single passage.It seemed like the area surrounding these trees are wilderness and there's no other way except this single passage.And so I passed branches to branches until I reached the end of the passage that led me to the second street.There I saw many people on both sides of the street.It was very dense traffic and many people are waiting for their bus while some were like me waiting for a chance to cross the street.I did not know exactly when but I was able to cross the street with other people...I was like going with the flow...Then I arrived in the church and I was looking for the door to enter and attend a wedding ceremony.It got me confused with all the doors and passages and all the people passing around in every direction...I saw stairs leading down to the underground where I heard a priest's sermon and then another door leading up to the balcony of the church.I chose to go upstairs but after 3 steps I was facing a giant steep step to continue to the next steps.I was able to take a grip on the side and let myself climb and continue going up.From the balcony, I saw the entire church and the bride and groom...although I did not really recognize them from far,it seemed like it's Myra's wedding(a friend of mine who's now in California) because I saw her mom and the rest of her family.When the wedding was finished I saw people starting to stand up and go out of the church.Then I recognized Jade...she was wearing a bride's maid dress and holding a bouquet of flowers.I greeted her.Then suddenly, my attention was drawn by the couple walking behind me...it was Neil and Annabel(in real life married to a swiss guy).They were sooo sweet and even holding hands while staring at each other.And so surprised of what I saw,I turned back to Jade and said," I thought you two were in a serious relationship..what happened?" She just replied,"It didn't work out."
And so it was like pushed into fast forward and I had to go down the balcony and back to the bizarre stairs.When I reached that giant steep step again,I figured out how the other people were able to go down there(especially that old lady I saw beside me in the balcony.And so I decided to slide down while holding on the side.When I reached the ground floor I saw some familiar faces that I've met way back in high school days.I smiled at them and continue my way out.Then I reached the side of the street and there I waited for a bus to go back home.After a while I started asking myself: Wait, which home are you going and what bus are you going to take?And then I look around and realizingI said: This is just a dream. AND I SUDDENLY WOKE UP...

I checked the time, it was 3:47 am... it took me a while to go back to sleep.hmmmm...well, they said it's normal to have bizarre dreams when you're pregnant...I even dreamed many times that I caught my husband cheating on me!!! And in one of those dreams I dragged that woman by pulling her hair and I kicked her downstairs...well,there were scenes I saw before I did that crazy thing...She left our house but left our door open.What woke me up was that scene when I screamed at my husband saying : "Since when did you cheated on me?"... and he just replied to me with a weird question, "Where are the photos? Have you seen the photos? " And my loud screaming reaction was like...WHAT PHOTOOOSSS ARREE YOUUU TALKINGG ABOOOUUTTT!!! CANNTT YOUU SEEE I'M MAAAD???

The moment I woke up I was really relieved it was just another crazy dream...

In the Beginning ( The Story of the Creation of this Blog and More)

Not so long ago, in a faraway kingdom of Belgium, a desperate housewife named Theresa decided to create a blog on the internet. And so her "behind the scene" story of how her blog was created goes like this....

"Late afternoon when the sun starts to set,my husband Marc came from his work. I told him I want to create a personal blog but I don't know where to start one.There are lots of websites offering free postings and all the craps and being less knowledgeable about internet stuffs I asked his opinion about it... instead of only opinion, I got his full-free package of services which includes him taking over the computer doing stuffs for me(he finds it easier and faster that way than letting me do it myself and bombarding him with tons of questions that take hours of his time explaining).So I decided to sit on the nearby sofa behind him...now instead of me asking him like maybe 20-30 questions usually starting with HOW's, it's him asking me maybe 4-8 questions usualy WHAT's... like What page color do you like? or What page layout do you like? The rest, I just leave it all to him...it enables us,especially him to save time and effort(on my side).The funny moment starts when it's time to put the title of the blog...so he asked: " What title do you like me to put? " Hhhmmmm...I haven't really thought about that...so he suggested: What about Theresa's Blog?" I said no,it's already too common to name a blog a blog...lol...So then I told him maybe some words that would more or less rhyme with Theresa...but I know him well he couldn't wait that long (like overnight)to make me decide...so he suggested again.What about: Theresa Ohlala or Ohlala Theresa...?" I didn't know how many milliseconds it took me to react to it... but we had a laugh like crazy...he added more crazy and stupid suggestions that really made my blog and that day unforgettable... And so it ended up with an agreement to have the title Theresa's World... for now...

My blog sharing is usually not about the things usual women share like tips on how to save on shopping or cooking or telling others tips on effective cleaning or how you get into the mode of fashion. In Theresa's World, I share simple things about my life according to how I see it.Everybody has his own way of living life .You see it according to how you want to see it...in a specific angle you chose.We each have our own versions of the story.For sure if you'll asked my husband his side of the story it wouldn't be expressed like mine.Because men and women, generally speaking, live in two different state of mindfulness...most men are mindful in physical state that involves seeing and touching while most women in emotional state that involves sentimental feelings and aspirations.So even though they are both involved in the same experience their way of experiencing it are not the same.So much with lecturing...let's go back to my side of the story.

According to me,the life we have as a couple is amazing... like in the game of The Amazing Race, we both race as a team...our mission is to make it to the pit stop as a healthy team...meaning no arguments or no hurt feelings and no exchange of harsh words...and to always remember that its just a game...if ever there is some misunderstanding,we have to talk about it and find a way to contemplate each other...

And now after 6 years of marriage,inspite of life's ups and downs, we still find the moments to laugh together, have fun together and even just sit beside each other without saying a word and still find it fun...even if sometimes it's hard for him to contemplate and understand me, but still we find a way to reach out for each other inspite of our cultural differences,our 12 years of age gap and him being raised in Mars and me in Venus.Now our extra mission is to reach out for our growing family...our son who was born on Earth,now speaking an alien "Frenchic" language that sounds more like french mixed up with english accent and a chinese pronunciation that he calls,in his own term, a "Singapore" language...Makes me wonder how it will be with our second child ( still under construction )....